By Grace Murphy
How can flowers bloom when your circumstances give me no space to grow
My palms are filled with empty space no love or hate
And nothing I can dwell or take from
And I'm not sorry that I learnt to love myself enough not to care
Because you never learnt to make amends with me or be fair
I can only give you the truth
My pain is seeping through anywhere longs too
I can feel the walls of my heart breaking
I can feel my bones aching
And If you had any love within you it was forsaken
I do not write because I am gifted nor because I am inspired
It is simply because my ghost is endangered
And requires to be lifted from your strain I carry tonight
Yes I'll pray for the day I wake up
And don't hesitate to smile when I see my reflection
But my youth is longing for a persons protection
A voice that tells me your aggression is not my fault
And my priorities are not your emotions for they are mine
But in all honesty what did you expect?
A child so little looked after,
All she knows is how to cope with neglect
I know you don't care if I can't see the light of day
You tell me it doesn't matter if I'm not okay
I don't bother to talk because you claim "Gracie I need to rest again today."
And in the spring on the beautiful mornings that I could never enjoy
Every time I breathe I still hear your voice
That it was because of my choices
Your demons became who you are
I remind myself daily that you are not a reflection of me
Even though I see you in everyone I meet
It's clear to see you wanted another version of yourself
A "mini me" I guess
Because somehow you could pass on your lack of mental health upon to someone else
And I am not because I learnt to love myself enough not to care
So I could finally learn what it means to be me
And not dig down into a ground of toxic weeds
At last I can breathe.
How can flowers bloom when your circumstances give me no space to grow
My palms are filled with empty space no love or hate
And nothing I can dwell or take from
And I'm not sorry that I learnt to love myself enough not to care
Because you never learnt to make amends with me or be fair
I can only give you the truth
My pain is seeping through anywhere longs too
I can feel the walls of my heart breaking
I can feel my bones aching
And If you had any love within you it was forsaken
I do not write because I am gifted nor because I am inspired
It is simply because my ghost is endangered
And requires to be lifted from your strain I carry tonight
Yes I'll pray for the day I wake up
And don't hesitate to smile when I see my reflection
But my youth is longing for a persons protection
A voice that tells me your aggression is not my fault
And my priorities are not your emotions for they are mine
But in all honesty what did you expect?
A child so little looked after,
All she knows is how to cope with neglect
I know you don't care if I can't see the light of day
You tell me it doesn't matter if I'm not okay
I don't bother to talk because you claim "Gracie I need to rest again today."
And in the spring on the beautiful mornings that I could never enjoy
Every time I breathe I still hear your voice
That it was because of my choices
Your demons became who you are
I remind myself daily that you are not a reflection of me
Even though I see you in everyone I meet
It's clear to see you wanted another version of yourself
A "mini me" I guess
Because somehow you could pass on your lack of mental health upon to someone else
And I am not because I learnt to love myself enough not to care
So I could finally learn what it means to be me
And not dig down into a ground of toxic weeds
At last I can breathe.